Homesickness

It’s honestly ironic. Before I came to college, I was counting down the days until I’d be out of the house. Now, I count down the days until I get to visit home again. This feeling of longing for home, uncomfortableness and insecurity about where we currently are, is called homesickness. Homesickness has everything to do with attachment as we long for a place that is associated with stability, consistency, and predictability. For me, I feel like college is just an obstacle I have to get through before going to where I’m truly happy, home with my boyfriend, family, and friends. With COVID-19, it’s difficult to meet people and establish relationships with them; it’s also a huge reason why I yearn for my friendships at home. With these, I feel most comfortable and at ease.

Home sickness has been described as a “grief reaction, similar to having lost a loved one,” but in this case, the person grieves for the loss of a familiar place. Homesickness has been associated with depression, axiet, insomnia, problems with appetite, and difficulty concentrating. Although homesickness if not a clinical condition, those disorders can definitely amplify a person’s longing for home.

To normalize this homesickness, you must firstly recognize that these feelings are normal and perfectly valid. These bad feelings won’t last forever and it’s all part of the process of moving to a new place. It’s also important to recognize that homesick feelings will come and go in waves; hence the temporariness of it. Personally, I tend to feel this way when I’m alone, either doing work or simply walking around. When I get back to interacting with people though, these feelings begin to dissipate. The best thing you can do now is begin to make more connections with your new environment. Whether it be going out to talk to people or exploring your new surroundings, force yourself to get up and get out.

I like to take a break in my day and go for a run or go to Marino for a quick session at the gym. That way, I can distract myself while also sharing a space with people who are within my community. I also like to discover new coffee shops to do work in! Not only will I be physically exploring, but I will also be surrounded by diverse groups of people.

Lastly, remember to be kind to yourself. Change is hard and homesickness is only part of the process of transitioning. I lived all 18 years of my life in Rhode Island. It will obviously be a huge adjustment to suddenly get up and leave the environment I’d become accustomed to all of my life. Remember that with time, self-care, and support, these feelings of homesickness won’t last forever.