There’s nothing wrong with being independent but there is something melancholy about being alone. Not eating alone or not having any friends but just being alone with no one around you. Imagine waking up one day and realizing that you’re the last person on earth. No matter how hard you scream or where you look, it is just you. One would definitely go crazy being alone. You start to think you hear someone behind you but it’s just the wind blowing leaves and branches around. You start going down a rabbit hole and think, “If I broke my leg, there is no one around to help me and I’m going to die a slow atoning death”. These were some of the thoughts I had when I went hiking by myself for the first time.
I love nature and everything to do with being outside. One night I had this big urge to just go hiking. The following day I woke up and checked the weather and it was 10 degrees outside with the real feels in the negatives. My wanting to go hiking suddenly split into yoloing it and not wanting to get hyperthermia. After a small internal battle with myself, I decided to layer up and go outside to see if I was comfortable. I packed some tea, water, and trail mix. I stepped outside and the cold hit my face and instantly woke me up. I was now excited and went to drive to Blue Hills Reservations.
I always wanted to do a solo hike but there was a part of me where the thought of being alone in the middle of the forest absolutely terrified me. I thought about walking into the middle of a murderer burying a body, falling down a cliff, getting lost and losing service, and everything else that was the result of overthinking. But then I get snapped out of this negative thinking by chirping.
I stop. And listen.
*chirp chirp chirp*
I slowed my breathing down til my breath made no sounds and my eyes searched the trees to find where the chirping was coming from. I admired the little birds talking to each other and flying around from branch to branch. I start to wonder what they were talking about. Are they singing to each other? Or are they alerting one another that there is a large creature that walks on two legs suddenly stopped and is staring at them? I stared for 2 more seconds before continuing, laughing at the thought that kid birds were complaining to their mom that they are hungry.
Going on a solo hike was spiritual. It gave me the space to think out whatever was in my mind rather than brush them away as junk thoughts. Every so often, I would stop and appreciate the view or listen to the birds again. The cold didn’t bother me much as the constant moving heated my body up. But there were some points where my ears and fingers stung from the cold wind nibbling the tips of my uncovered body.
Blue Hills Reservation is HUGE and the size surprised me being so close to Boston. I started on a trail but decided to choose a direction at random when I came across a split in the trail. The thought of reaching an endpoint was gone and I ended up wandering around for 4 hours. Towards the end, I felt a bit sad to be leaving but my body couldn’t take more walking.
There’s a calming being surrounded by nature and all there really is are the green life, birds, and the sound of the wind around you.
